Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Not Letting the Gloom Set In

Sometimes we feel like everything we try to do...or not do...is not good enough.  And it is times like this that I try to turn my perspective around so I can understand why I feel this way.  Am I truly a failure in everything?  Lately it is feeling like a failure in how I manage my time.  I haven't had the motivation to do much around the house or with my schooling.  I guess it has finally clicked in my head that my DH is really gone for 2 months.  I am in that "funk" and am trying to escape it...quickly!  I knew this would happen, it always does...when he leaves.  So what am I going to do about it?

I am thinking back on what I've done today and how bad really was my time management?

0715: Get out of bed, start laundry, take care of dog's needs
0730: Workout on treadmill
0815: Take shower
0830: Feed and dress kids
0850: Drive KJ to school
1000: Go Visiting Teaching
1130: Eat lunch
1200: Watch an episode of Care Bears with Connor, snuggle up to some books and put him down for a nap
1300: Blog, start to study my school work, text my DH to see how his day has been going

Seems like a pretty productive day so far.  Complete 180 of what my day was on Monday -- of just lounging on the couch and watching episodes on hulu.com all day, missing my DH.  I can at least see that I am changing.  And that is the point!  I think I have my hubby and my loving Heavenly Father to thank for that.  I was praying that I could get out of this funk, that I could find some motivation to just get up and do something...anything!  My DH was texting me and for a couple days, hounding me if I had touched my school work at all.  Finally, yesterday I told him I was thinking about doing that after the kids went down instead of watching episodes....and I did!  I studied for a few hours reading 1/2 my chapter and making an outline for it. 

It feels so good to be learning and studying again.  I know I can always count on my HF answering my prayers when I need them and also for my DH to be one who pushes me so that I can reach my full potential. 

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